Posted by
Gunner Sykes on Monday, September 29, 2008 10:26:26 PM
Commentators at MSNBC were livid Monday when CNN announced it had hired
Tina Fey to play Sarah Palin for mock interviews with the Republican
nominee for Vice President.
"This is bad news for America,"
whined Keith Olbermann. "All news networks should have equal access to
Tina Fey. She interviews much better than Sarah Palin, and is much more
accessible. We have been forced to re-write the news for the next
eleven days because of CNN's greed."
"As the line blurs between
reportage and the absurd, it is absolutely necessary that people who
play political figures be readily available to anyone who wants to do a
hatchet job in the name of journalistic integrity," echoed Pat Buchanan.
"Signing
Ms. Fey to a two-month contract assures that no shortage of Palin
material will stop us from daily reports maligning Governor Palin,"
crowed Wolf Blitzer, of CNN. "We will save enough money on film editing
to pay Ms. Fey's contract. No one can predict what Governor Palin will
say or do. Instead of spending hours editing video to present Sarah
Palin in the worst possible light, we will be able to script our
interviews. This decision benefits our viewers and saves us a few
bucks."
"Tina and I have always worked well together," said
Cambell Brown. "I look forward to working with her. No one can feed me
a straight line like Tina."
Reports that Fox News had plans to
interview a marionette closely resembling Barack Obama were quickly
denied by Bill O'Reilly. "We thought about it, but decided that a hand
puppet would be more appropriate. Cheaper, too."
Vice President Dick Cheney was unavailable for comment.
Gunner Sykes